Strike while the sorrow is hot

Jake came out of the confessional and ran to his mother. “Well, what did the priest tell you, honey?”

“He said that I should ‘strike while the sorrow is hot,’” Jake replied with a huge smile.

“That’s the first time I’ve heard that expression,” his mother said. “Isn’t it supposed to be ‘Strike while the iron is hot’?” she adjusted her son’s collar.

“I guess so… The priest said that I should do something about my sins right away,” the boy said.

“What did he mean by that?”

“That I shouldn’t let my sorrow grow cold but fire it up to bring up new love after having offended Jesus.”

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To strike while the sorrow is hot signifies that the person should not delay amending the consequences of sin in himself or others. Very often one gives in to making excuses even through common and valid expressions such as “No one is perfect,” “I’m only human” and “To err is human.”

Although these reasons are certainly true, they can be comfortable alibis for not immediately struggling to correct one’s defects and vices. The person can also fall into a “false sentimentality” that confuses sorrow with “emotionally feeling bad.” This eventually delays the indispensable grace of God, “who alone can forgive our sins,” from converting us.

When man sins, his conscience naturally awakens his heart with guilt or sorrow. There is no man, no matter how callous his conscience may be, who is not exempt from the awareness of either the goodness or evilness of his actions. Sorrow for one’s sins and the desire to make up for them is called contrition.

Genuine contrition is not something to be loosely confused with something felt. Benedict Baur says: “Genuine contrition does not consist merely in saying, ‘I should like not to have done it.’ Nor is it a sensation, an emotional feeling of sorrow, something felt in the senses. No, contrition need not necessarily be felt in the senses at all. It is in the will. It is a purely spiritual thing, a determination of the will—which may or may not be accompanied by feelings of sorrow.” (“Frequent Confession”)

This determination of the will differs from one person to another. Thus, we can say that the quicker one reacts to one’s faults, the easier will it be for God’s grace to forge his love in our intellects and wills that are, so to speak, softened and made vulnerable for a new conversion.

Ponder on this unthinkable example: If I now slap your mother whom you love dearly, when do you expect me to apologize for such an outrageous act? (a) Right this very moment, (b) three days from now—because I’m still busy, (c) three weeks/months/years from now since you will most likely forgive me anyway.

Everyone I presented with this example naturally chose the first answer: Right away! One’s immediate response to undo one’s wrongs naturally demonstrates a genuine intention to change. Something similar happens with one’s contrition.

Our contrition is more genuine and converting of us when we are quick to respond to the awareness that we have done an injustice to God, neighbor and let us not forget our very own selves. Any delay out of fear, feelings of unpreparedness or unfounded reasons that one cannot be forgiven are simply excuses. This delay makes our contrition grow cold, the gap between our sorrow and the moment of sin widens, and our will loses another opportunity for conversion.

How do we keep the fire of sorrow burning within our souls?

• To constantly seek God’s presence in our life. This is especially nurtured with prayer and constantly bringing the portrait of sorrow and love seen in our Lord’s Passion and Death.

• Aside from prayer or meditation, we must strive to meet our Lord in other occasions throughout the day, e.g., in work, rest, sickness and social engagements, etc.

• Not to wait for occasions of sin to arise. One ought to set and seek occasions of love and virtue, through concrete daily resolutions.

• If one unfortunately falls, he must resolve to immediately seek God’s forgiveness through Sacrament Penance as soon as possible. In the case of sins which may not be grave, to make many acts of love, contrition, and reparation instead of wasting his time mulling over the fact of having fallen.

• Finally, to do a refined and sincere daily examination of conscience, striving to feed the fire of our sorrow with concrete resolutions of love and amendment.

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Don’t forget that Sorrow is the touchstone of Love. (The Way, no. 439)