MANILA, Philippines—For Filipino-American Melissa Roxas, it was like going on a journey back to a “dark place” but one she had to make so that the world would know of the human rights abuses in the Philippines and that the “abductions and torture” would stop.

In an emotional press conference in Los Angeles, California, on Sunday morning (Manila time), Roxas burst into sobs as she publicly recounted how a group of men she said were military agents tortured her to the point she thought she would die.

The 31-year-old Roxas said that as a result of her ordeal—during which she said her tormentors tried to suffocate her by pulling plastic bags over her head—she had been having nightmares every day.

“Talking about that is like going back to that dark place. But knowing I spoke the truth about what happened to me keeps … fear from drowning me. Instead, I get to keep that bit of light inside of me,” Roxas said in the news conference shown simultaneously online.

She said she came out to tell her story because “I don’t want what happened to me happen to anyone else ever again.”

“I want the world to know what happened because the Philippine government and military should not get away with what they did to me,” Roxas said.

“They can’t get away with what they did to many people. Many families are still looking for their loved ones and many more still missing.”

Arnedo Valera, Roxas’ lawyer in the United States, said his client would seek damages in a US federal court against the Philippine government.

Valera also said his group would file a complaint before the US Department of State and the United Nations.

Writ of amparo

Roxas was visiting the Philippines for an “exposure program” last month when she was reported missing in La Paz, Tarlac, on May 19. She returned to her Tarlac home on May 26. She said she was abducted by men she believed belonged to the military.

Roxas is a member of the US chapter of Bagong Alyansang Makabayan (Bayan), a leftist group. Bayan said that from Roxas’ account, it appeared she was detained at a military camp in Nueva Ecija, presumably Fort Magsaysay.

The Philippine Daily Inquirer first reported Roxas’ ordeal on June 3, citing an affidavit she submitted to the Supreme Court that granted her petition for a writ of amparo, a legal remedy designed to protect a person from harassment by security forces and requiring them to investigate allegations of abuses.

Roxas has returned to the United States and her press conference Sunday marked the first time she told her story in a public forum, Bayan said.

UN concern

Lt. Col. Romeo Brawner Jr., spokesperson of the Armed Forces of the Philippines, denied that Roxas was tortured by military agents at Fort Magsaysay.

“Nothing of that sort happened. We already asked all units in the area and we found that they have nothing to do with that,” Brawner said over the phone.

The Philippine military and the police have been haunted for decades by allegations of torture, summary executions and other forms of abuses.

Last month, the UN Committee Against Torture expressed grave concern that perpetrators of torture in the Philippines, including the military and the police, as well as senior officers, have operated under “a climate of impunity.”

The committee called on the Arroyo administration to investigate such cases and punish those responsible. It deplored the “the very limited number of convictions” resulting from government investigation.

One was called ‘Sir’

Wearing a black blouse, Roxas told the media between sobs how her abductors beat her and how one said they were “instruments of God” to make rebels return to the fold of the law.

“I told them that my God does not torture people,” Roxas said.

Roxas and two companions, Juanito Carabeo and John Edward Jandoc, were abducted in La Paz. After six days, she was freed followed by Carabeo. Jandoc has been reportedly released but has not surfaced.

Reading portions from her affidavit, Roxas said she was constantly grilled by men who addressed one of them as “Sir.” She said she was told she was abducted because she was a member of the communist New People’s Army (NPA).

“I told them I had rights and demanded a lawyer. I told them I was just a writer and a volunteer. They told me that even if a year would pass, I would never see a lawyer. That in there, I had no rights,” she said.

‘I couldn’t breathe’

The interrogators also asked if she was ready to die.

“They told me before they killed people, they made them pee and shit from pain before they die, and then they dragged me out of my cell,” Roxas said.

After more beatings, one of the torturers pulled two plastic bags over her head.

“I started to suffocate I could not breath anymore, started to see white and [I was] thinking I was going to die but then he released the hold,” she said.

“I knew it was the military that had me. They kept telling me that I was a member of the NPA and made me sign some docs but I refused. I kept telling them I was a writer and health care volunteer.”

Plea for justice

Roxas asked the American and Filipino peoples “and all believers of truth and justice” to help her and other torture victims get justice.

“It has to end, the killings, enforced disappearances, the abductions and torture,” she said after breaking into sobs again.

Valera claimed the Philippine government was trying to escape liability by saying Roxas’ story was “stage-managed.”

“Melissa was tortured. That is a fact,” he said.

According to a press release by the local human rights group Karapatan, there have been 1,010 cases of torture and 1,013 victims of extrajudicial killings since President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo came to power in 2001. During that period, there have been 202 victims of enforced disappearances, it said. With a report from Jocelyn R. Uy