The indeterminate

The Maker wonders if “indeterminate” is synonymous to “unknown.” Probably not exactly. But perhaps their meanings would come close judging by the way we use the two words nowadays. But there would surely be a difference. Is GMA’s ultimate fate indeterminate or is it merely unknown for now? To quibble about it is, of course, inevitably absurd. But inevitably absurd is probably the overlying theme of all this. Yes, that plus a bit of irony.

Indeed, He only heard about the arrest warrant issued against Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo last night through the sounds coming from his neighbor’s television. The Maker heard this as he carved away at a huge wood sculpture he is finishing for his Dec. 22 sculpture exhibition  titled “Bulahan ang Bunga sa Tiyan Mo.” This show is a compilation of his works, both painting and sculpture, on the religious theme. It is a kind of retrospective covering the period 1978 until the present. It has been over 10 years since his last one-person show and so the Maker is understandably a bit nervous about it though he is resolved that it will happen even if the venue is as of now still indeterminate. Or is it merely unknown? Not to worry, the show will happen even if he has to hold it in a manger somewhere.

The sculpture he is working on is called “Maria Asuncion,” a large piece a few inches taller than he is when it stands on its one-foot- high pedestal. It is of Mary bourn to Heaven by an angel. This piece has taken the better part of his attention for over a year now while he carved away at the ancient “tugas” to draw out the final figures. The final outcome is as always negotiated between the artist and the piece of wood. In the end, it is the wood that finally decides. The Maker theorizes that the best way to make the wood “come to life” is by treating it from the beginning as if it were alive, by talking to it, by asking it what it wants to become. The artist is only mind, hands and eyes dealing with an entity he cannot fully comprehend at any single instant. The wood, after all, is chipped away little by little and while the carver must hold in his head an idea of the shape he desires, this must always be subject to the cuts the wood itself will allow. Some cuts are impossible. And so the artist and his idea must be flexible. And it must be open to every possibility that reveals itself as the final figures slowly take shape.

“Maria Asuncion,” just like most of his other works including those done from copper or bronze, has been a singular magical and spiritual experience for the artist. There is a point in the course of making the sculpture when it “becomes” the entity the artist is trying to shape. There comes a point in time when it “opens its eyes” to its maker and begins to “speak back” at him. In the case of “Maria Asuncion,” this point actually kicked the artist backwards against the studio wall, humbled and stupefied. For quite suddenly, one night, the work revealed itself in a different light and he began to see things in the sculpture he could not remember placing there.

There is of course a scientific explanation for everything including this. Theories of perception have long held that humans will always see more things than are actually there. Consider the way we see things in clouds. And, of course, each beholder of every “santos” will see exactly what he or she hopes or expects or prays to see. That is the true power of the santos. But there is also the power of the indeterminate and the unknown that we can choose either to believe or disbelieve.

And so also with our perception of the GMA issue. I suppose that beyond all these arguments about the legal and political rightness of all that is occurring before us in this case, there are core arguments that are always the hardest to talk about. If GMA is ever going to be justly punished for her alleged sins, this would be a historical precedent for this country. The closest precedent would be Erap but look what happened to him. After a short jail term, he was freed and almost became president. The Marcoses are back in power. And whatever might happen to GMA there can be no doubt whatsoever that her fiefdom will always be there awaiting the time for returning her or her progeny once again to the top of the heap. And in the mean time, we will continue as we always have. The ruling class have their ways. And for us who only work every day to get by perhaps to achieve the dreams we have for ourselves and our family, all these ways may as well be the unknown and the indeterminate. For now, anyway.

And so it was right that I should be hearing about all these inside the ambience of unreality such as would be constructed by the sounds emanating from my neighbor’s TV, blaring away  as it always does the latest news from Manila. I am carving away at my wood which has taken on the shape of entities sacred to me. Ang bulahang Maria Asuncion is flying weightless on her angel’s arms. The angel looks upwards beginning its flight to Heaven, hair falling, revealing the right ear suggesting we are allowed an assertion by way of faith: God listens.

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