Grief over storm deaths finds outlet in streets of Tacloban

AN ENTIRE village joins its widows in commemorating the 40th day of their husbands’ deaths at the height of Supertyphoon “Yolanda” during a candlelighting ceremony in Tacloban City. SHIENA BARRAMEDA/ INQUIRER SOUTHERN LUZON

TACLOBAN CITY—Cupping his hands around the flickering candlelight and shivering in an old white sando that was a size too large for his thin frame, 8-year-old Edcel Earl Balaes planted his slim white candle on the pavement along Real Street, one of this city’s main thoroughfares.

“This is for my pet rooster because he died when the tidal wave hit our house when ‘Yolanda’ came,” he said. Despite the laughter that erupted around him after he said this, Balaes  remained serious.

He said his pet deserved to be remembered like all those who died 40 days ago in this city and in many other areas in the country when Supertyphoon “Yolanda” lashed through central Philippines on Nov. 8.

Balaes  joined many other storm survivors in a candlelighting ceremony here for the 40th day of the deaths of thousands of city residents whose bodies had been either buried in mass graves or have not been found. Catholics observe the 40th day of a person’s death in commemoration of Jesus’ ascension to heaven 40 days after his death.

The ceremony was organized by Erlinda Olivia P. Tiu, Eastern Visayas director of the Philippine Information Agency, with the group One Tacloban Civic Group and local TV network Countryside Associated Television 8.

The survivors lit a chain of candles on a 10.1-kilometer stretch of road from the city center to Daniel Z. Romualdez Airport. The chain passed through Anibong District, where hundreds are believed to have died when four ships docked in the port area were lifted from the sea by 20-foot waves and slammed into populated communities.

Colored candles, provided by the Department of Tourism, were planted on the road to form a chain of light.

Tiu said the ceremony sought to gather family and friends in a solemn tribute to those who died in the storm. She said it was the brainchild of Jeff Manibay, a local broadcaster who himself lost parents in the disaster.

“When I lost my parents, I could not grieve properly,” said Manibay. His parents’ bodies have never been found.

“In mass tragedies like this, grieving becomes communal, not personal. You get to feel other people’s grief with yours,” he said.

His grief still showing in his eyes, he said he did not expect the number of participants to triple from the expected 1,200 people.

Manibay said that under normal circumstances, the 40th day of the dead in the Philippines is celebrated with merrymaking in homes.

“But, in our case, we cannot have the same emotion because we all lost our homes. So I thought, maybe we should do it on the streets then,” he said.

Lilia Dadula, 53, lost her husband Conrado, a vendor, who died at the age of 57 when the storm washed away their house in a coastal village.

She sat on the pavement with fellow widows—daughter-in-law Charice de la Cruz-Dadula, 30, and Emma Cabiltes, 42—with their husbands’ pictures propped up in front of them beside lighted, white candles.

The entire Barangay (village)  88, consisting of 150 families now temporarily living at Tacloban People’s Center, was at the candlelighting ceremony, mourning along with the widows as they commemorated the 40th day of their husbands’ deaths.

Charice said the bodies of her husband Orlando, Lilia’s son, and Cabiltes’ husband, Diego, were among the last to be found on Dec. 3 under the debris.

Near Tacloban Convention Center, which now serves as a temporary evacuation center, Lenlen Resurecion Bausing lighted candles for her sister-in-law, Gloria Bausing Cavite, 67.

Bausing scribbled a message that read “Gone but never forgotten” on top of Cavite’s picture.

She said Cavite’s body has yet to be found after she was washed away by strong waves.

Among those who joined the candlelighting was government employee Romeo Badilla, who became misty-eyed when he spoke of his nephew, Fredrick. Tuesday, the 40th day, would have been his nephew’s 24th birthday and civil wedding to his fiancée.

The bodies of Fredrick and his fiancée, Joy Garil, who was six months pregnant, were found on Dec. 6 under the debris in Anibong District. Badilla recalled how his nephew’s head fell off while a backhoe was retrieving his body in the coastal area of Barangay 66. He said he still could not comprehend how a promising, caring, young man could die so suddenly.

Badilla’s neighbor, Gloria Hernandez, 49, said she was just pretending that her nephew, Christopher Palle, 37, was just vacationing somewhere with his wife and son who also died in the storm.

Manibay, the local broadcaster, said the activity sought to give closure to those who lost relatives and friends.

Records of the Office of Civil Defense in Eastern Visayas showed that as of Dec. 17, the total number of fatalities in Yolanda  stands at 5,715.

“We are stronger than most people think. We also want to show the world that we will always remember 08 November. That was the day hell descended on earth upon us,” said Manibay.