Spotting signs of bullying

(Third of a series)

Bullying is not a one-off event. The physical, verbal, emotional and psychological harassment can go on indefinitely unless, and until, adults and responsible people take notice.

Dr. Jerry Jurisprudencia said adults, particularly teachers and parents, should take note when a child often looked sad and teary-eyed, moody and depressed. His/her personal possessions might be damaged or clothes, books and other things might be missing. There might also be some unexplained bruises, scratches, even wounds on his/her body, he added.

The Miriam College professor, who spoke at the recent observance of World Suicide Prevention Day organized by De la Salle University-Lipa and the Natasha Goulbourn Foundation, said bullied kids had few or even no friends. When the bullying got worse, they would be afraid to go to class, take the school bus or participate in group activities.

Jurisprudencia summarized the signs of bullying with the acronym SIP CAGES: sleep (increase or decrease in sleeping time), interest (diminished involvement), psychomotor (agitation or slower response), concentration (lack of it), appetite (increase or decrease), guilt (low self-esteem), energy (listless) and suicidal ideation.

While bullying did not always lead to suicide, the depression it could cause in the bullied could lead to thoughts of killing oneself.

Jurisprudencia said: “The intensity of bullying could lead to aggression. The bully can also kill (or) it can lead (the bullied) (to commit suicide).”

Bullying could take different forms. Put-downs, resulting in the bullied’s low self-esteem; name-calling, rumors, verbal threats, harassment, intimidation, social isolation or exclusion and physical assaults were just some of the tools bullies used to harass their victims, Jurisprudencia said.

Bullies, he said, did what they did as retaliation for their own suffering (they were victims themselves), for laughs or entertainment value or because they loved to torment others, enjoying the experience of inflicting pain and suffering.

They often suffered from the low self-esteem that they wanted their victims to experience. Jurisprudencia said they could also be bullying because of peer pressure, the need for attention or respect or easy access to weapons.

And, as Education Secretary Armin Luistro said at the same event, bullies were often exposed to violence at home, the community or media. They were victims of early childhood abuse or neglect, Jurisprudencia said.

Stressing how serious the problem of bullying was, Jurisprudencia said in his class of 35 at Miriam about half reported experiencing bullying.